Christmas Time

This Christmas was a lot of fun. The boys were very spoiled by Santa, and their grandparents. It reminds me again about how lucky we have been during this time when so many people are struggling. On Christmas Eve we went to Bunkerville to be with my family. We had tons of fun, and every one was there. All my sisters, their husbands, and kids. It only happens once a year that we are all able to get together, and it was awesome. The men went on a four wheeler ride, and the women stayed home to get ready for the dinner. What a dinner we had. There was so much food, and it was all so yummy. I told my mom that this is why she was blessed with all girls, because we can put on a mean party. :) We all got our traditional pj's and reenacted the nativity scene. So many amazing family traditions, and I'm so glad we have kept these traditions alive.
The following are some pictures from Christmas morning.



Silly Jaxon! That smile makes me laugh.

Bryson was so fun this year. He talked about Santa everyday.



Paper Jamz, best 10 dollar present ever.

Everything was opened so fast!

BB in the ear!

Before I post the pictures I think that I need to explain my self. First we had to be at the hospital at 6am. So we got up at 5:45 of course, because I can't understand the need of getting out of bed before 6. So I look o so lovely, and I forgot my camera. So these picture are taken with my phone, and they were awful. All that being said, I will start the story.
On Wednesday I went to pick my kids up for Taleesa's house. While there I got talking to Taleesa about things, and was trying to heard the kids out the door at the same time. While doing this Bryson told me he found a bb. I simply said cool bud go get in the car. While he was sitting there so patiently he decided to put that bb in his ear. In his words it was for, "Safe keeping." I thought yep it is safe all right no one can get it from you in there. So I called the pediatricians office and made an appointment for later that day to get it taken out.
This time I thought it shouldn't take that long it must happen all time. There is no way that my son is the one child to ever do this. We waited and waited for almost an hour for the doctor to see us, and once in the room we waited again. The doctor finally came in, and tried one thing after another to get this bb out but it wouldn't budge. After another hour of trying the only thing that was accomplished was me learning that the most common object stuck in a child's ear is a popcorn kernel. Two hours later I left the office with that information and the number of an ear nose and throat doctor. This time my thoughts were he really did put it in a safe place.
The next day I called this doctors office got an appointment. The appointment was scheduled for 11:00 a.m and we didn't even see the doctor for an hour and half. This doctor tried everything that he could. He tried suction, water, and holding him down but that bb was not moving. The final option was surgery. They were going to have to sedate him so that they could reach deep enough to get it out. So now I was leaving this doctors office 2 and half hours later with number to the hospital to register my five year old for surgery. My thoughts were really how much is this bb going to cost me.
So on Monday morning at 6 am we arrived at the hospital and we're really ready for this bb to come out. It took the nurses an hour to get us checked in, 15 minutes to convince Bryson to take the sedative, and another 30 minutes for it to kick in enough for them to take him back. Brandon and I walked out into the waiting room, and he went to the car to get his book. Before he returned the doctor came out and gave my that darn bb. No joke after waiting around for almost two hours he got it out in ten minutes.

Such a handsome little boy all dressed and ready to go.

The ugliest picture of me ever, but this is my brave little boy.

He was getting sleeping!

Recap: $25 to the pediatrician and two hours of my life
            $50 to the ear nose and throat doctor and two and half hours of my life
            $$$$$$$ for the hospital (REALLY) and another two hours of my life, and it was out in less than ten minutes. This is the most expensive bb ever made.

Really it is a good thing I love him so much!

I did it!!!

This picture has nothing to do with the post, but it's the only one I have of me!

 

I finally graduated from College!!!!! I know it has taken me so long, but I did it. There were a lot of tears, and times that I wanted to quit but it was worth it. I always wanted to get my degree. I just didn't figure out what I wanted to be until Jaxon was born. I struggled with depression after his birth, and lack of sleep. This beautiful little boy didn't sleep through the night until he was eight months old. When I say sleep through the night I mean sleep at all. He was up every 15 minutes crying, and many nights we both cried ourselves back to sleep. It was during one of those long nights that I was praying about the direction my life was taking, and if it would be possible to achieve my goal of being a college graduate when I looked down at my beautiful son (of course he was awake) I thought I should go back. If I can make it 8 months without sleep with a one year old, then school will be easy. My decision to become a teacher I owe to my amazing aunt Cheryl. She told me that I could do it, and was able to see my strengths when I wasn't. I owe this little man for challenging me in a way that I didn't know I could be, and showing me that I am stronger then a think. It's amazing what your children can teach you, and that is also true for my children at school. I have learned so much from them all, and I'm so excited about my future.

Thanks to all my family that supported me and my family through this time. My little sister Taleesa was amazing and watched my boys every Wednesday for the past year. She had to get up, and come to my house with her own little man in toe. She never complained to me, and I owe her so much. This last semester my mom had Jaxon every Tuesday, and she too had to get up so that Brandon could drop him off and get to work by six. Davi would take by boys anytime I needed to get to school and Brandon wasn't home from work yet. The first semester Chelsie had them three days a week for a few hours while I went to class. Brandon, man, I don't know many husbands that would put up with all that I have put him through. There were many nights that I was doing home work and he took care of the boys. He would have them ready for bed, and all I had to do was kiss them good night. Many days he wore dirty socks to work, because I was too busy to do laundry.

WOW writing this is making me cry. I'm such a lucky girl. My family is awesome and their support has meant more to me than anything else. Your love has amazed me and I hope one day I can return the love that you have shown me.

Pumpkin Time

The boys were so excited to carve a pumpkin. They asked for several days to do it. I finally got Brandon to do it, and the following is what happened next. This happened almost as fast as I could take the pictures. ENJOY!

They were so excited!

Now we are down to just Jaxon watching.

Daddy is all alone! They lasted about 5 minutes. It was so funny to watch them loss interest.

Let the focus begin!!!!!!

He is so funny. I wish that I could have gotten a picture with his tongue out, because that is a true focus picture. I love that he does so much for the kids.

The finished project! Brandon did a great job!

My baby is 4!

Wow I know that Jaxon turned four a month ago, but I've been so busy that I haven't had the chance to blog about him yet. It's so hard for me to think that my baby is four. He is getting so big, and I just want him to stay small. He is an amazing kid, and I'm so glad that I'm his mom. He teaches me something everyday, and without him life would be very dull. Brandon and I joke that if we didn't have him we wouldn't even know we had kids. Bryson is so quite, and can play by himself for hours. Jaxon on the other hand can't last 2 minutes without coming to just check up on us. He has to be where the party is, and we have a love hate relationship about this. I guess he is like his mom in this way, but he is always so worried that he is going to miss something. If they is ever anyone at the house he has to be right there waiting for them to comment on how cute he is. And really who can blame them he is so darn cute. He was so excited to turn four, and he had such a great time at his birthday party. I on the other hand was a mess, and with Brandon working out of town I really leaned on my mother and law and mom. They are so great to help when they can, and I really don't know what I would do with out them. Jaxon had a great time, and even through it was raining never noticed how crazy his mom was. (Some times I'm grateful they are so young so they won't remember crazy mom time.)
Here are some more pictures from his birthday. He was so lucky to have his cousins, aunts and uncles there.

Such a silly kid! He loves spider man right now, and so we had a spider man party.The cake was kind of a disappointment. I never seem to have enough time in the day, but it may not have looked to good but it tasted great.

 Love this little girl, and Jaxon feels the same. He loves to go to Mesquite, and play with her. She is such a doll. So glad she could come up with Grandma Pat.

Sophie Love her too! She gets so shy when she comes to my home. I am so glad that she came, because Bryson loves her. He asks to play with her, and having her there was a big help to me.

Here is a picture of his loot. He was so spoiled. He is so lucky to have so many people that love him. I feel so blessed to have every one in my life.

Some of the funny things that he does.

1.  Thinks that he will be 5 soon.
2. When we dropped Bryson off at school on the first day. He said crying, "I'm going to be so board."
3. He still loves his blanket.
4. He is the neighborhood politician. He love to get all the kids together to play, but SHHH don't tell him he is the youngest. He runs the show.
5. Is a mommas boy (Love that one)
6. Still likes to cuddle at night
7. Love to get hugs and kisses in the middle of the night. He says that he has to make sure that I'm still there.

He is an amazing kid!!!! So glad he is mine!

Love Them!

This last month has been crazy. Talk about going a hundred miles an hour in every direction. I feel like just when I have it all figured out things change. It's hard for me to trust strangers with my kids, and even harder to know if the choices that you are making will affect them long term. Is it even good for them that I am so busy? I know that people say that kids are resilient, but how much change can they take. Jaxon has always been a momma’s boy, but lately with me being gone so much he has gotten worse. I think that this is the consent struggle of a working mom. Never truly know if what you are doing is going to harm your children, or if they would have been better off if you had just stayed home. Being a stay at home mom is a hard job too, but the pay is even worse them being a teacher. :) So my internal struggle continues.

Student teaching is a lot of work, and I think that my boys are starting to worry that their mom is going crazy. The reason that I say this is the other day when the boys asked for peanut butter sandwiches for lunch I jokingly told them to make it their selves or wait for me to finish what I was doing. When I walked into the kitchen to make it for them a few minutes later this is what I found.....

Yes spider man costume and all!

Bryson told me that they were trying to help out. They are so cute! I couldn't help but laugh as tears rolled down my face. This sweet little boys were trying to help out their crazy mom who could only think about getting her to-do list done. I decided that I would spend the rest of that day playing with them, because if they were so willing to do what they could for me then I should really return the favor. Sometimes my life gets so crazy that I forget to stop and take in the little things. This was a moment I will be telling their future wife's, and I don't want to be so busy that I don't appreciate how wonderful these moments really are. Enjoy the rest of these picture, because I sure did.

Yummmmm!

Man that was a lot of peanut butter!

Big brother takes charge!

Silly smile! This is the only way that he is smiling now.

So proud that he was able to do it by his self.

Remember 9-11

When thinking about ten years ago today. The feelings that I have are hard to describe, but the one thought that I keep coming back to is hate. I still don’t understand how a group can have this strong of a feeling towards another that they are willing to use people as missiles. Children… To sacrifice the lives of so many over HATE, and to awake the beast that is the USA.



Ten years ago today I was driving to school, and was confessed by what was happening. The news said that there had been an accident, and that a plane and hit the world trade center. Because of my fear of flying I thought I knew that it wasn’t safe to fly. Still there was confusion. What kind of pilot hits a building? Was there fog? Was he drunk? How do you hit a building? I knew that there was something big going on. Once I got to school there was a note on the door that said, “I had a friend inside that World Trade Center. So there will not be class today. Please pray for my friend if you believe in such thing.” This was my only link to what was going on. I didn’t know any one that lived in New York, and as sad as I felt for my Professor I still didn’t really understand. All I knew is that I could go hang out with Brandon. Yeah no class!

By the time I got to Brandon’s apartment things of changed. Another plane had hit the second building, and also the pentagon. My feelings had changed at this point from confusion to fear. I was afraid for the future of America, and for the safety of the four boys that I was sitting next to. They were all talking about taking the terrorist out, and enlisting for the job. I was also mad. How dare this people attach my fellow Americans’, but is war right? Can you solve hate with hate? Or do you just bread hate. “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” Martin Luther King, Jr. The uncertainty was scarier than the change that was surly to come.

By the time the tours fell. The shock over the loss that people were feeling was emotionally draining. I sat watching the t.v. wishing there was something that I could do. Anything at all… Living so far away all I could do was watch. Brandon held my hand as I cried, because I am a cry baby. Watching the people walk through the ash looking as if they had come from war was heart breaking. Knowing that there was going to be so many people that will never see their loved ones again was awful. Thinking about the loss at the pentagon, and the amazing people that were strong enough to take back the flight 93 was hard to take. The emotions were unbearable.

The theme around that horrible day was confusion, and a quote that I later read gave me a since if peace. Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien said, "It is impossible to fully comprehend the evil that would have conjured up such a cowardly and depraved assault upon thousands of innocent people." The truth of that made me stop and think that I’ll never understand. I can’t because I’m not like that. So to truly understand I would have to go to a dark place, and I don’t want to go there. There is no horror for the lost if we lose ourselves in hate.

While watching the coverage today Bryson asked why anyone would want to hurt others this way. I thought about the best way to answer this for my innocent son, and the only thing that I could think of was I don’t know. I confessed to my son that I don’t have all the answers, and that people make bad decisions. Adding that on September 11,2001 some men made a really bad choice.



I wrote this post so that I will remember. I want to remember all that was lost, and the effect hate can have on life. I want to be able to remember where I was when this happened so that I can teach my children what I learned from that day. I know what I learned is different from others, but learning from the past is how we horror the memories of those that were sacrificed.

9/11 lost (Excluding Hijackers)
Work Trade Center 2,606 (411 First Responders)
American Airlines Flight 11 87
United Airlines Flight 175 60
Pentagon 125
American Airlines Flight 77 59
United Airlines Flight 93 40
Total Lost 2,977
The following are some picture of the memorials. I hope to visit these sites someday so that I can pay my respect for all the lives that were lost that day.

Memorial at the Petagon

Memorial for flight 93

Tear drop tower This looks like a beautiful memorail.

This is what you will now see in the place of the twin towers.